The Obsession of 'Figuring It Out'

Are we in a recession, or is this an economic depression? Does it matter?

Ask someone who is out of work if it matters!

I know many people who are struggling. Not long ago a friend of mine wrote that he knew where he was going in the next life, but that he couldn't figure out this life. Times are tough.

Good, capable people with normally very marketable skills are frustrated by rejection after rejection.

The temptation is to ask, "Why me? What have I done to deserve this?"

Another friend of mine just had a death in her family. The person was very young.

The mind tries to get a grasp of the situation, but it turns out to be an unsolvable puzzle. The mind thinks that if it could just figure out 'why' that somehow the situation could be satisfactory in some way. But the person is still gone, and that is unsatisfactory! And the grief goads the mind back to trying to figure it out. The mind is caught in an endless, painful loop.

Again, the temptation to ask, "Why?"

I was trimming the trees in my back yard. That's what the picture is, above. I was thinking about when Jesus said,

"I am the true vine, and my Father is the husbandman. Every branch in me that beareth not fruit he taketh away: and every [branch] that beareth fruit, he purgeth it, that it may bring forth more fruit." (John 15:1,2)

He was talking about a process in our lives, not a specific event in time.

I looked at the perfectly good branches I had cut from the trees, that were now laying on the ground. Nothing had been wrong with them. But according to my purpose (landscaping), they had to be cut.

The book of Job in the Bible deals with this question. Why does something bad happen to good people? Is it because of a failing on our part? Isn't God supposed to take care of us? Why does God let these things happen?

In one day Job lost all his possessions, lost his children, too. When he thought it couldn't get any worse, he broke out in painful boils. Know what Job said?

"And said, Naked came I out of my mother's womb, and naked shall I return thither: the LORD gave, and the LORD hath taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD." (Job 1:21)

"Then said his wife unto him, Dost thou still retain thine integrity? curse God, and die. But he said unto her, Thou speakest as one of the foolish women speaketh. What? shall we receive good at the hand of God, and shall we not receive evil?" (Job 2:9,10)

His closest friends did not desert him, but they didn't know how to comfort or console him. They tried to counsel him, to get Job to see that somehow he was less than upright. They thought he must be in denial about some sort of dishonesty or moral flaw. Try as he might, Job could think of no reason for these things to happen to him.

Finally Job gets to hear from God:

"Then the LORD answered Job out of the whirlwind, and said, Who [is] this that darkeneth counsel by words without knowledge? Gird up now thy loins like a man; for I will demand of thee, and answer thou me. Where wast thou when I laid the foundations of the earth? declare, if thou hast understanding. Who hath laid the measures thereof, if thou knowest?" (Job 38)

'Whirlwind' is probably an accurate way to describe the drama of Job's life!

I highly recommend reading all of God's answer in Job 38, indeed, read the whole book of Job!

I can anticipate what you might ask-- "So, what's the answer?"

The answer is-- There IS NO ANSWER. More precisely, there is no answer that would satisfy the mind, but the mind will go crazy looking for it anyways.

Isn't it our inflated ego that tries to convince us that we deserve answers to everything?

How we get stuck

In my previous entry I said

"Jesus' obedience was to make himself open to whatever God wanted from him. It is very important to note that Jesus did not stop with any 'basics'. Jesus went all the way, and that's the reason we can follow him. Jesus didn't get stuck."

Sometimes the writers of the Bible referred to things that hold us back as impediments, or things that make someone stumble. In other places the same things are referred to as chains that bind us. The picture we have of Jesus in the desert discusses these things as temptations. All of these are good descriptions, because they do trip us up, bind us, and seem good. And these can also be seen as fears, and as such, are ways that we can be controlled. They are all external things that we think will make us happy, but don't deliver.

Look at the temptations of Jesus in the desert.

Mat 4:1 Then was Jesus led up of the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted of the devil. And when he had fasted forty days and forty nights, he was afterward an hungred.

PHYSICAL NEEDS

The first was for physical sustenance, turning stones into bread.

And when the tempter came to him, he said, If thou be the Son of God, command that these stones be made bread. But he answered and said, It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God.

The first temptation was so close to home. Jesus was weak from his fast, and the temptation was really close to a mere observation of his need for food and water. Who would dispute that? Of course he needed food and water!

In our modern society one way freedom is denied is to become a wage slave. If you are in fear of the fallout from the loss of your job, you might be tempted to justify even unethical actions. After all, you may have a family to feed!

How do we break the chains of being a 'wage-slave' to our job? You don't have to quit your job, just recognize that life is more than a paycheck. Your boss doesn't own you.

"If only I had my needs met, I would be happy!" -- But happiness doesn't depend on paying any bills. In Matthew 6:25 Jesus says,

Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment?

There is much more to life than the physical, there is the spiritual. And both types of sustenance come from God, not your employer.

RECOGNITION

The second temptation was that Jesus could jump from the top of the temple and not be hurt.

Then the devil taketh him up into the holy city, and setteth him on a pinnacle of the temple, And saith unto him, If thou be the Son of God, cast thyself down: for it is written, He shall give his angels charge concerning thee: and in [their] hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone. Jesus said unto him, It is written again, Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God.

It appealed to a sense of power and of status. Here is another way we can end up chained and controlled, just like a bought politician.

This stumbling block is societal. It is all about power, status, having some sort of recognition. It is about the fear that someone else will get the promotion ahead of us.

"If only I were appreciated, recognized, I would be happy!" -- But happiness doesn't depend on pats on the back.

Therefore when thou doest [thine] alms, do not sound a trumpet before thee, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may have glory of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.

I think most personality disorders and controlling behavior falls into this category. In our attempts to control situations and people, and pursuit of recognition, we might use all sorts of justifications for what good we can accomplish. But power, status, or recognition that is of any value is our status with God. Everything else is as ethereal as a cloud.


RICHES

The third temptation was to gain the whole world-- materialism.

Again, the devil taketh him up into an exceeding high mountain, and sheweth him all the kingdoms of the world, and the glory of them; And saith unto him, All these things will I give thee, if thou wilt fall down and worship me. Then saith Jesus unto him, Get thee hence, Satan: for it is written, Thou shalt worship the Lord thy God, and him only shalt thou serve.

The song 'Billionnaire' by Travie Mccoy is very popular now, expressing the mindset of most people nowadays, it seems.

"If only I were rich, I would be happy!" -- But happiness doesn't depend on riches.

Riches become your chains, your master, because once you have them you must guard them lest they be stolen. You worry that somehow everything will be taken away, and this worry will rule you.

Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal: But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal: For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.

But as we noted with temptation number two, everything of TRUE value comes from God. And as with the proper response to temptation one, everything we TRULY need comes from God.

LIBERATION

At first these external pursuits look good to us. And we ask ourselves how something that is good can ever be bad for us. There is a saying, 'The Good is the enemy of the Best'. When the road forks, you can't take both paths.

Jesus came to light the path, to show us the way to freedom. By following his example we too can keep from getting stuck. And if we already feel trapped, following his example can liberate us from our bondage to this world. But you have to follow him, do what he did, step where he stepped, so to speak.

What Jesus tried to communicate was this: If everything of value and everything we need comes from God, then that's the end of discussion! Why would we look to the external world for what only God can give? We don't need to give room in our thinking to the lie that we will be happy if we can get, grab, collect, or have. These external things no longer rule us, or even have any meaning to us, because our whole existence is on another level.

for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things. But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself.

Maturity

We are accustomed to the prepackaged and ready to go. Everything should be within our immediate reach, so we can claim it, use it, and move on. Forget the journey, we only care about the destination. This is the voice that says, "I don't care about the process, I want the product and I want it now!"

I am convinced that we are in desperate trouble if we forget the journey. The journey is the point.

Paul said in I Corinthians 3:1-3

And I, brethren, could not speak unto you as unto spiritual, but as unto carnal, [even] as unto babes in Christ.
I have fed you with milk, and not with meat: for hitherto ye were not able [to bear it], neither yet now are ye able.
For ye are yet carnal: for whereas [there is] among you envying, and strife, and divisions, are ye not carnal, and walk as men?

Paul also said something similar in Hebrews 5:11,12

Of [Christ] we have many things to say, and hard to be uttered, seeing ye are dull of hearing.
For when for the time ye ought to be teachers, ye have need that one teach you again which [be] the first principles of the oracles of God; and are become such as have need of milk, and not of strong meat.

Paul wished that people were ready to move on but that they were still babies, still clamoring for milk when he would have liked to give them meat. What did that mean? How were they childish, not ready to grow?

First thing to note here is that there IS more to discover when you get past the basics!

What keeps us stuck on the basics? "For ye are yet carnal...[there is] among you envying, and strife, and divisions..." We are stuck on the basics because we are still thinking like we used to. We still insist on looking for the differences, not the similarities. And ultimately, if you carry the 'differences' seeking approach out to its logical conclusion you will end up standing 100% alone!

If we are to move from milk to meat, we have to grow, mature. A person can only grow when they are open to the process of growing. We are to return to that child-like wonder and openness, not be childish, immature. Opening yourself is the first step to discovering something new, and growing.

Maturity is a process, rather than a destination.

Do you know that Jesus went through this process of openness, in order to grow?

Hebrews 5 tells about it:

For every high priest taken from among men is ordained for men in things [pertaining] to God, that he may offer both gifts and sacrifices for sins:
Who can have compassion on the ignorant, and on them that are out of the way; for that he himself also is compassed with infirmity.
And by reason hereof he ought, as for the people, so also for himself, to offer for sins.
And no man taketh this honour unto himself, but he that is called of God, as [was] Aaron. So also Christ glorified not himself to be made an high priest; but he that said unto him, Thou art my Son, to day have I begotten thee.
As he saith also in another [place], Thou [art] a priest for ever after the order of Melchisedec. Who in the days of his flesh, when he had offered up prayers and supplications with strong crying and tears unto him that was able to save him from death, and was heard in that he feared;
Though he were a Son, yet learned he obedience by the things which he suffered;
And being made perfect, he became the author of eternal salvation unto all them that obey him; Called of God an high priest after the order of Melchisedec.

Jesus' obedience was to make himself open to whatever God wanted from him. It is very important to note that Jesus did not stop with any 'basics'. Jesus went all the way, and that's the reason we can follow him. Jesus didn't get stuck.

What does God want from you? Make yourself open to it, accept it, and enjoy your journey!

Separation

In this modern society it is so easy to isolate from others, to see other people as either obstacles or vehicles. It is so easy to fall into a pattern of thinking in which the whole world revolves around you. Our society actively encourages us to build ourselves up, to grab what we want. Even our modern vacations have become shopping sprees, to get more stuff. And yet, even with a bunch of new stuff, are we fulfilled?

Maybe occasionally as we drive out of a shopping center we will see some scruffy looking panhandler and either be annoyed and look the other way, or...? Is there a slight feeling inside?

Is there a regret for the panhandler's condition, or a greater regret from the sudden realization that I have lost much of my capacity for compassion? Where did it go? Does this mean that I am a 'bad' person?

How can I get back to having a healthy sense of compassion for my fellow man?

If I don't 'feel' it, how am I supposed to do what Jesus said?

And, behold, a certain lawyer stood up, and tempted [Jesus], saying, Master, what shall I do to inherit eternal life?
[Jesus] said unto him, What is written in the law? how readest thou?
And he answering said, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind; and thy neighbour as thyself.
And he said unto him, Thou hast answered right: this do, and thou shalt live. (Luke 10:25-28)

Here is an interesting paradox. Have you ever noticed how someone who looks for fulfillment in things outside himself is considered self-centered, yet someone who instead embarks on some deep internal soul searching finds contentment with the outer world? Which one is more likely to show love, charity, or compassion to a stranger?

Have you ever noticed baby birds in a nest, how they cry for their mother to feed them? Isn't that a good illustration of someone who looks for their happiness in external things? You take care of me! Feed me! I need!

What Has Value?

There is a parable in the Bible about wheat and tares (begins at Matthew 13:24), in which the workers found that weeds were all through the wheat crop. When they asked the owner what to do he told them to leave everything alone, that the weeds would be separated out at harvest time.

This is very plainly telling us to be tolerant and let God figure it out, in His time.

I love the Tao Te Ching and it's view of God, because it says that anything we come up with can never define God, just as we can never fully define what it means to be human. And if we can't define God, and we can't define exactly what it means to be human, why do we start thinking that we can define what it means to worship God or be 'called according to His purpose'?

There is a respectful reverence there, in not seeking to define God or judge people, and in waiting and listening for God.

I feel the need to reveal a little of my own story, as it relates to the above.

As I grew up, our family went to church several days and nights of the week, and I attended private Bible school Monday through Friday. All of our family and friends were Christian too. It was a pretty one-sided experience, though not bad.

I went to Bible College, but had some maturity problems and dropped out in my 3rd year. All my plans of becoming a minister were blown. I felt disgraced at home and at my church. I felt I had failed at the only thing I truly was meant to do in life.

I had trouble adjusting, but I found work. I fell in with a group of guys who loved to drink, and I went through a time when I was very self destructive. At one point I realized how bad I had let things get, and I prayed for God to do something, anything, or kill me. One or the other.

The very next day, a person was put in my life that literally turned me around. If it wasn't an angel from God, then I don't know what.

I started going to church again.

A couple of years later I completely fell for a woman, and we married. But it turned out that she was not motivated towards God or church, and over the years we were successful in uncovering many other areas of incompatibility.

We had two great kids. It wasn't all bad.

During our marriage I had still tried to attend church, although it was hit & miss.

When 9/11 happened, I was in shock. And over the next couple of years I felt like one thing after another was taken from me. I couldn't be proud of my Texas heritage, because Dubya was making all Texans look like fools. I couldn't be proud of being Republican because the Neo-Cons had taken over the party and were making all Republicans look like criminals. I couldn't be proud of being a Christian, because the Religious Right was saying that if I wasn't pro-Bush then I was anti-American and anti-Christian. And finally I couldn't even be proud to be an American because we were attacking Iraq, who had absolutely nothing to do with 9/11. All the intel turned out to be manufactured, and we had a baboon of a leader that thought it was all a joke. I was disgusted with the church, that all of Christianity was now in bed with such criminals! WWJD?

I fell away from the church. I still loved God, but for a time I refused to call myself a Christian. I reasoned that the peaceful philosophy behind Aikido was the healthiest, and seriously began studying Eastern philosophies. I found a lot of valuable wisdom, and for me these philosophies began to reawaken and amplify my relationship with God.

I found I could not get away from God, and He brought me back to what I feel is authentically following Christ. After all, I never stopped having an awe-filled wonder of Him and a deep fascination with the person of Jesus Christ. And I can't get enough of Jesus. I am consumed by him!

I know this, without a doubt- The relationships we have with others are deeply spiritual bonds, and as such are way more important than laws, customs, ideas, or anything else. Herein lies integrity, honor, love, dedication. In a way (not Jesus' intent but my own, for what it's worth), these spiritual bonding relationships are the wheat, and our casual encounters with things and people that we treat as things, are the tares. Only the wheat has any value.

ADDENDUM:

After I wrote the above, I realized that many may not understand what I was trying to say. I did not explicitly state what I was getting at in the writing above, but I don't want anyone to miss it. So let me explain:

1. We are not here to judge our neighbor. Not only is it not our job, but judgments, being external things, are useless to us. It's like a foreign currency that we cannot spend. Worthless!

2. I related my story as an illustration of the idea of 'process' which is why none of us is in a position (literally) to judge another. None of us watching the tennis match have the view from the referee's seat, above. Only God can see the whole picture.

3. In my story is a definite turning away from external religion, external bits of societal 'bling' (like pride in this or that), to an internal seeking of God, and internal communion with God. On an individual level only what is inside lasts. Neither moth, rust, nor thieves can touch it!

Connection

Aside from any religion, faith, or philosophy, education or lack thereof- despite any socioeconomic or ethnic differences- regardless of country or geographic location- not caring about personal likes, dislikes, weight, age or any other perceived differences- the time has come for us to come together. We need to open dialog, and we need to get to know each other. We need to be present with each other!

I don't even care if you disagree with me, we still need to come together!

The world can be a harsh, cold, and impersonal place. It didn't start out that way, and here's a secret-- it doesn't have to stay that way for you if you don't want to live like that!

"That sounds great. What does it cost?"

Well, for some the price may seem too high...

"Cut to the chase-- how much will it cost me?"

Only your bias, your pre-conceived ideas.

In 'I and Thou' Martin Buber says,

"Insofar as a human being makes do with the things that he experiences and uses, he lives in the past, and his moment has no presence. He has nothing but objects; but objects consist in having been.
Presence is not what is evanescent and passes but what confronts us, waiting and enduring...
What is essential is lived in the present, objects in the past."

What he means by objects in the past is pre-conceived ideas. Judgments. Have you ever met someone and gotten the impression that they had already made up their mind about you? That's what Martin Buber was talking about-- being objectified, summed up and pigeon-holed into a category. It's not being present.

This being treated like an 'It' is one of two ways that we humans interact with our world. The other is to instead intimately interact as equals, as a 'You'.

I really like how Martin Buber treats being present in the intimate interpersonal:

"This is no metaphor but actuality: love does not cling to an I, as if the You were merely its 'content' or object; it is between I and You... Love is a cosmic force. For those who stand in it and behold in it, men emerge from their entanglement in busy-ness; and the good and the evil, the clever and the foolish, the beautiful and the ugly, one after another become actual and a You for them; that is, liberated, emerging into a unique confrontation. Exclusiveness comes into being miraculously again and again-- and now one can act, help, heal, educate, raise, redeem. Love is responsibility of an I for a You: in this consists what cannot consist in any feeling-- the equality of all lovers, from the smallest to the greatest and from the blissfully secure whose life is circumscribed by the life of one beloved human being to him that is nailed his life long to the cross of the world, capable of what is immense and bold enough to risk it: to love man."

We either find a connection with others, or we end up treating them as objects. One or the other. Take your pick.

I think we are already connected, all of us, and that pointing out this connection was a major part of Jesus' ministry.

John 15:1,2 says:

I am the true vine, and my Father is the husbandman. Every branch in me that beareth not fruit he taketh away: and every [branch] that beareth fruit, he purgeth it, that it may bring forth more fruit.

First impulse is to read this with attention to the main meaning-- the branches that are removed. But there is also something else here-- It sounds like all of us do have a connection! (True, a parable is an analogy and we don't want to over-examine it and end up making false assumptions.)

Mal 2:10 says we all have one source:

"Have we not all one father? hath not one God created us?"

There is the parable of the wheat and the tares in Matthew 13:24. Note that all are in the same field, and not separated from each other!

Act 10:34 says God looks at us equally:

"Then Peter opened [his] mouth, and said, Of a truth I perceive that God is no respecter of persons: But in every nation he that feareth him, and worketh righteousness, is accepted with him."

Some might think that Matthew 10:34 could rebut any talk of togetherness:

"Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law. And a man's foes [shall be] they of his own household.
He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. And he that taketh not his cross, and followeth after me, is not worthy of me.
He that findeth his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it."

As you can see, Jesus was not saying that he brings a sword. He obviously meant that we would have troubles in this life from persecution.

LIKE... MINI TRINITIES?
Probably because Buber's 'I and Thou' has been on my mind, I had an idea yesterday about the sacred spirit of the relationship. It is complete conjecture on my part, so it may or may not have merit.

I have heard of the Trinity described this way-- There is God the father, and Christ, the son. The relationship between the father and the son is the Holy Spirit.

If that is the case, then when we have relationships we make miniature trinities all the time!

God and I, and our relationship make a mini-trinity.

You and I, and our relationship make a mini-trinity.

Jesus did say something not the same, but similar in Matthew 18:20:

"For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them."

If this is true, that there is a sacred spirit of our relationship, then what would it mean to grieve the spirit (in this connotation)?

Ephesians 4:30-

"And grieve not the holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption. Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you."

If we all are branches off of the one true vine, and so have a connection to God and to each other, perhaps in these smaller, trinity-like bonds of relationship, 'grieving the spirit' would be to ignore the connection, to instead show bitterness, wrath, anger, clamour, evil speaking, or malice.

Maybe how to foster good, sacred bonds with others is to "be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you."

That is why we turn the other cheek. That is why we love our neighbor as ourselves!

Remember-- I'm not talking about just having relationships with like-minded people. That's too easy.

We have a good quality, sacred, connection right now to every other human being on the planet. It just needs to be remembered, reawakened, and enlivened!

God and Spirit

There are some things that need to be stated unequivocally before we go any further. (This is my viewpoint right now, but I'm keeping an open mind if better ideas show up.)

1. We are not God, but we DO have a God nature, or spirit. God breathed into us life and spirit from Him, at creation. But that doesn't mean we can then say that we ARE God any more than my son could use my driver's license to drive. If you think you are God then you should be able to do something small, like whip up another inhabitable planet that's not too far away (can it be too far away if you are really God?).

2. We can connect with our God nature / explore our own spirituality, and this brings great pleasure and fulfillment to our lives. We can then have our spirit/God nature connect with another's spirit/God nature, and we have valuable, lasting bonds of friendship. And it is very good.

3. But connecting with our own internal God nature is not the same as connecting with God. If we worship our own internal God nature, given to us by God at creation, we are not worshiping the creator, but the creation itself. Our God nature was and is part of our creation, so if we worship IT that might be 'good' but not the 'best'-- worshiping the Creator, God Himself.

4. How do we communicate God to others? Depends on where they are, their culture, their frame of reference. So for modern self-realization/enlightenment people, we recognize that they are already into spiritual things and becoming attuned to our true God nature. That is a very good thing! This is common ground on which we can meet!

5. Many modern Christians have lost their connection with their God nature, their spirit, for various different reasons. I don't think God intends us to live such a meager, sad experience either, and Jesus was trying to point this out. When we are out of tune with the God nature/spirit then our relationships with others suffer tremendously. We end up trashing the planet, making life miserable for all. Christians have much to gain by reconnecting with the original spiritual philosophies that were common even just a few hundred years ago. The common ground between modern Christians and modern enlightenment folks is beneficial to both sides!

That is where I am coming from in the writing of this blog, to reawaken spirituality in the modern Christian, and to get God, who has been much maligned in modern times, back into the dialog of the modern spiritually conscious enlightenment crowd.

People are spiritually starving! I see a gaunt fatigue of malnutrition in the modern church, and empty weariness in spiritual seekers outside the church. Jesus came that we should be fed, and not be hungry.